Confessing and Repenting as Believers

Day 105: Psalms 38:1-8

            Psalm 38:2 For Your arrows pierce me deeply, And Your hand presses me down. 3There is no soundness in my flesh Because of Your anger, Nor any health in my bones Because of my sin. 4For my iniquities have gone over my head; Like a heavy burden they are too heavy for me. 5My wounds are foul and festering Because of my foolishness. 6I am troubled, I am bowed down greatly; I go mourning all the day long. 7For my loins are full of inflammation, And there is no soundness in my flesh. 8I am feeble and severely broken; I groan because of the turmoil of my heart.

            Lord, I have felt Your arrows in me. My sin and my guilt have been before me. I feel my guilt and Your displeasure like it was arrows piercing me. I feel Your hand heavy upon me because of my evil and sin. I have brought this on myself. It is my responsibility. It is my evil, my failure, my foolishness. Lord, please forgive me.

            I know some of the pain for my sin spiritually, mentally, emotionally, and physically. My sin has brought Your anger and chastisement.  I feel the weight of my sin. I have no strength because of my sin. I am like a man who has gone under the waters of my own sin and failure. My sins are too much for me. My sins and foolishness have brought trouble and consequences for me and for my soul. I feel the weight and it is overwhelming. I am broken, weak, and weeping. I mourn and weep all day long. Wretched man that I am, who will deliver me?

            When I read about those men in times past who wept over their sin during times of revival, I begin to understand. In some small way, I realize that Jesus Christ died to pay for this sin, this awful guilt that I try to carry, but cannot ever carry. It is too much for me.

            My sins and their guilt continue to weigh down of me. Like the secret of Dorian Gray, so my sins may not be seen to a watching world, but I know them, and they make me weak and distracted. O Lord, when will You come and give me the assurance of Your forgiveness?

            I groan when I have left matters unsettled. They keep my mind from thinking clearly. I cannot and do not follow You as I should. Lord, forgive me. Have mercy on me. I would fall apart if You left me in this state. Do not let the guilt of my sin eat me up. I cannot enjoy my food. My stomach burns within me. The stress in my chest becomes too much. I shiver and feel the consequences of my sin even within my own body.

            By Your amazing grace grant me the grace of full repentance and faith in You (Acts 5:31; 11:18; 2 Timothy 2:25; Romans 2: 4! May I and all Your children continue to look to Jesus and set aside every sin that clings to us (Hebrews 12: 1 & 2).

            Through Jesus Christ alone, Amen!